Feeling blah. In a funk. J’ai le cafard. Il faut me remettre . . . . Weather or planetary alignment? Maybe the explanation lies in my horoscope. . . .
Horoscopes these days are consulted for romance, business endeavors, finances or those cranky attitudes that can’t be attributed to anything else. In earlier times, princes and kings placed the utmost importance on their horoscopes, consulting them prior to invasions, marriages, political alliances or perhaps even to explain that royal “cafard.”
Astronomers like Kepler supplemented their incomes by making astrological predictions. Anne of Austria asked for the horoscope of the dauphin, the future Louis XIV. Apparently, this early horoscope was not too favorable, but Louis XIV lived for 72 years, proclaimed, “L’état c’est moi,” enjoyed the pomp and splendor of Versailles and depleted the treasury.
On March 21, with that feeling of the “cafard” intensifying for no reason, I consulted both American and French horoscopes to learn what the stars and planets had in store for me. None of my horoscopes was particularly encouraging. MSNBC implied that my dreams would come to fruition if I showed patience. After a rough week, the horoscope implied the weekend would provide a respite. The French Yahoo site mentioned that personal relationships were coming unraveled. Take a break, it advised. Recharge my batteries. Although the daily horoscope is free, the week-long version is 2,95 Euros, and the extended version is 11,95 Euros. Best to avoid that expenditure if it means more bad news.
Madame Figaro provides a daily barometer that has four categories (with icons ranging from a smiling sun to a frowning, gray cloud). Bien être (well being), carrière (career), humeur (disposition or temperament) and amour (love). A sunny icon said that in terms of energy and vitality, I am “dopée,” or psyched. Career, another sunny icon, promised an “auspicious time” in terms of a finding a job. That is good news in today’s recession. A frowning, gray cloud by the category disposition meant that I have the “tendency to see things negatively and to become angry at things that are unimportant.” Another gray icon clouded love and relations with friends and family.
These horoscopes only reinforced my "cafard." What would royalty do with such a week of dire predictions? Or did astrologers generally give rosy horoscopes just to retain a lucrative position in a royal court? I will check again next Sunday to see if the forecast has improved.
Wait! There’s one more—the horoscope page from the Closer, a French movie star/ gossip magazine, was beneath work papers and my coffee cup. The horoscope for Taurus reads like this: “You will finally achieve your dreams. The fear of failure had made you forget about them. Now, you are finally ready.”
Given that stars and planets are aligned in my favor (for now), I’d better stop.
No comments:
Post a Comment